Rising sea levels and a presidential p**n star s*x scandal could be signaling the end of days for us humans. Good thing Costco has started selling food kits that can sustain a family of four for up to a year. So if Trump ends up starting a nuclear war with North Korea (or Russia, or Iran), I guess we won’t go hungry.
The kits range in price from about $1,000 to $6,000. The latter includes a whopping 600 cans of food to keep a family of four alive on 2,000 calories per-person, per-day. On the other hand, if you want to work on your bikini body during the zombie apocalypse, the cheapest kit has 96 cans of food and will feed one person on a diet of 1,200 calorie per-day or a year. Buyers can expect such delicacies as freeze-dried broccoli and dehydrated apples, which can last up to 25 years. Yum…I think. Other foodstuffs, like instant lentils and instant black beans have a 30-year shelf life. Damn. Who needs FEMA, when you have Costco?